Relationships are messy. Oh, you might already know that. I also know this, no not from my own experience but because of my observational power that is one of the best features of my personality, despite being funny ofcourse.
My failure in the area of relationships has helped me in a way. Like Thomas Alva Edison had said, “I have not failed. I have just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” Thanks to my failure, I have a list of things not to do in a relationship.
Most of you would say that this is cliche. But still, we as a tribe, continue to do that. You might think your lies are justified but you shouldn’t overestimate your sense of judgement. For eg- lying to her because you have a Birthday surprise for her is justified while lying to her that you did not smoke so that you both don’t fight isn’t a rightful cause no matter how much you think otherwise.
2.Make your girlfriends jealous
Only boys make their girlfriends jealous and not Men. While you think her getting jealous shows how much she loves/likes you, it can also show how she is feeling a lack of love. Learning from oversmart men who lost their relationships just because they took their girlfriend’s insecurity as a joke, I strictly recommend not to do so.
3.Not choosing your media
The media has been constantly feeding us an idea of a perfect relationship and a perfect bachelor life. Do not believe it. If your idea of love life is inspired from Pyaar ka Punchnama, then let me burst your bubble- you don’t get a fancy monologue in real life. From Kajol choosing Srk over Salman in Kuch Kuch hota hai even though he had friendzoned her and chosen the other, more beautiful chic, to Jimmy Shergil in umm basically every movie, media’s idea of love is already pretty messed up. No, you singing in a public place would not get you a girl and maybe you should start with this lesson while choosing what influences your mind.
No matter how fancy the ‘I own’ ‘Aww, all yours’ tags sound on Instagram, the real world does not appreciate ownership. When you are in a relationship, try to think of you and your girlfriend as partners and not you owning her or vice versa. Give each other the space you require and help them grow as a person. If being in a relationship, you aren’t a better version of yourself or you feel that you are constantly in pressure to behave in a certain way, then maybe it’s time to embrace singlehood again.
5. Not recognising the red flags early
“When you look at someone with rose-coloured glasses, all the red flags look just like…flags” by Wanda from Bojack horseman.
Being in a relationship you need to remember that your relationship isn’t your diet. You don’t need to defend it everytime. Trust is an important part of a relationship but it shouldn’t be blind trust. You need to recognise the red flags early in the relationship or those might be the reason for the end. For example- if your partner always seems busy and does not put in efforts to talk to you or if she thinks that yelling at you and getting her way around is ‘cute’ then you might want to reconsider your relationship.